Author: lekiare

There are questions that are positively easy to answer, and then there are questions that just leave me dumbstruck. The "what happened to you" question always falls somewhere in the middle. Depending on who asks it can be fairly simple to answer even if the answer might be a little complicated. If a stranger asks, they’ll regret ever asking that question again.

My neighbor, Mika, asked me the question two days ago. It completely unbalanced me. I think I wasn’t prepared even though I caught myself taking the deep breath and reminding myself to keep eye contact with him. The words came out as if I were an encyclopaedia. Automatic and even a bit self-deprecating. Telling him at that moment made me feel so vulnerable, so exposed. I’ve known Mika for weeks now. He’s such a sweetheart, and we have fun together (his espresso is to die for). The most remarkable thing he did after I told him was nothing. No apology. No pity-like stare. Nothing. He just chatted on about this guy he wanted to date and had promised to lift because the poor thing had broken his legs. Simple as that.

Except for me it was the most difficult revelation I have had to make to a new friend in a while. And I know I wasn’t devastated. I think I was really just afraid of what he’d think of me after I gave him the whole spiel. Maybe I was even disappointed. He didn’t give me the satisfaction of acting like everyone else. And if he did, he hid it really well. No, Mika accepted my explanation and moved on. I looked into his eyes and he was smiling. Mika was thinking about the guy.

So much for easy questions.

The newscasters are throwing around the "d" word again. Drought. Already? I just want it to rain so it can cool down and don’t have to see those three little digits we like to call 100. This does not include the head index.

Rain, where are you? I miss you!

Hand it to CNET to find the wacky Japanese inventions. And this one is just amusing – a device that teaches men about menstruation. It bleeds and simulates cramping. Watch the creepy video. And then threaten to buy one the next time a guy friend says we’re just complaining.

Seriously, I love the Japanese.

What a stressful week it must have been for the Teabaggers. Elena Kagan was confirmed as the next female Supreme Court Justice, Lindsay Lohan was released from jail, and California’s Proposition 8 was declared unconstitutional. Of course now the Governator wants same-sex weddings to resume seeing as the amendment violates the Equal Protection Clause and can’t be enforced anymore. It’s only fair, right?

California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger and Attorney General Jerry Brown filed motions Friday calling for resumption of same-sex weddings in the state.

The officials filed the motions after U.S. District Judge Vaughn Walker previously overturned California’s voter-approved gay marriage ban, known as Proposition 8.

Resuming gay marriage "is consistent with California’s long history of treating all people and their relationships with equal dignity and respect," Schwarzenegger said in his legal filing.

Walker ruled Wednesday the ban violates federal equal protections and due process laws.

Really the only thing missing is for other states to follow California’s lead and allow gay marriage. Unfortunately, it’s not going to happen until this thing gets to the Supreme Court. Hopefully, Judge Walker will allow the resumption of the weddings.

For the past few days I’ve been dreaming. We all dream, so its the most natural thing, but the majority of the time we don’t remember them. I don’t remember my dreams, except for these last few days. They have been wild and crazy and beyond absurd. I’ll wake up and feel as if I’ve escaped the insanity of it all, and then while I’m doing some meaningless task my dream will return to me in all its disturbing glory.

I used to love to dream. I used to get such wonderful ideas from my subconcious. Now my mind is telling me that I’m upset, and I need to deal with it, or it won’t leave me alone. At least that’s what I hope it’s trying to tell me. Me, the mistress of calm and patience. It feels like I’m oozing anxiety from every pore.

And it’s not work, and it’s not me.

It’s just so difficult watching the people around you get hurt. Worse still if they face the possibility of becoming disabled. For me, I was born this way. I don’t know any other life than this. For them, it’s being taken away. It affects them and the people they love. I feel like I’m facing a ticking time-bomb that’s about to go off. Will it happen or won’t it? Life goes on regardless, but what a crappy thing to happen. And because it’s personal, it affects me more because I know what lies ahead.

I just hope this person gets better.

And my dreams stop.

Every time I see an article on self-publishing, I get this sick little grin. Who would have thought ereaders would have made self-publishing so relevant now? When I started up my domain I was just proud to find people willing to share their writing and learn from each other. Maybe even try to put an anthology together, but the task of such a thing was in itself daunting. Back then even publishing something on your own was difficult and expensive. Now, it’s as simple as clicking a button or so it seems.

Until recently, reviewers and booksellers looked down on self-published authors the way Anna Wintour scorns Dress Barn. Now new writers and established authors alike are increasingly taking publishing into their own hands, and the publishing establishment is paying attention. According to a recent Bowker report, the market for “nontraditional books” in the United States grew by more than 750,000 new titles in 2009—a 181 percent increase over 2008. Five of the top 100 bestsellers in the Kindle store—which now produces more sales than Amazon’s hardcover list—are currently self-published.

Electronic books are very easy to make, and they’re quite inexpensive compared to a hardcover edition. Couple that with ease of access and 70 to 80 percent in return of royalties, and it’s a better bargain for the burgeoning author. The only downside is that you’re not going to sell if you’re not any good. Out there in commercial land, it’s difficult to sell one good book well while being inundated with drivel.

So while it’s getting easier to spread the word and publish the next Great American Novel, I have a feeling that the publishing industry isn’t quite finished yet.

So Catholicism and Anne Rice do not agree with each other? And it only took 10 years for the woman to figure this out!

I just hope she doesn’t decide to write more adventures with dear ole Lestat, because if she assassinates another character I may have to give away my autographed edition of Interview with the Vampire, and I really don’t want to.

Leave my vamps alone, woman!

Deeply Problematic has the new Carnival up. The theme this time is evidence. It’s a pretty good read.

Media dis&dat has a transcript of President Obama’s speech yesterday, and links referencing the ADA’s Anniversary.

Some of the highlights from the speech include a mandate that any newly constructed buildings be completely accessible, including private businesses.

Obama also signed an executive order promising to hire more disBLED federal workers.

It’s an interesting read.

Here I am calmly listening to Pandora, and suddenly out of the blue Eminem starts blaring through my speakers. I am not a rap fan, but this is the second song on his Recovery LP that I’m just loving. Actually, I’ve always enjoyed his music though I always thought that it lost it’s ingenuity because the radio stations played it just too much. And here he is again, releasing new music with the same powerful effect. How can a Lady Gaga radio station start playing Eminem? If I get NIN I will be amused.