damn the muse

What's the best way to distract one's self before impending bar results? I'd love to know. I need to know, especially after the lovely nightmare I had last night. It was bloody brilliant.

Basically, I spent the entire time avoiding the internet. My phone was ringing, my parents were calling, the signs were pointing towards a positive result, but in my head I was convinced I had failed! I was at the testing site and a panel from the Board of Law Examiners was even passing out pamphlets with pictures of all testers who had passed. They had a special section for the five timers. Five had made it, and I was one of them. My picture looked awful. I wanted to choke the man who gave me the pamphlet.

Still, I wouldn't check my voicemail, and I refused to look online. The worst part of not passing is not seeing your name on that list. Never again would I go through that humiliation. And when I finally checked my messages the next morning, they were meaningless. I received the letter in the mail, and my parents opened it. It was a certificate stating I had passed, but I felt sick to my stomach. Then I woke up.

See, I'm doomed.

I'm in dire need of a distraction.